Yipee...........
" Fare hikes from tomorrow ", the newspapers read out aloud . Two days of not having rickshaws and two days of taxis off roads. Union leaders/ politicians with selfish motives win after two days of harrowed public transport experiences. Smile, smile you taxi drivers and smile, smile the rickshaw buggers.................You get to squeeze us even more now.
Cut two, lets see how has the fare hike so well fought for, changes the commuter experience for the great city of Mumbai ?
" Bhai sahab , dadadada nagar ? ". The sly bastard replies with a worthless "click " (in short, bugger- off, who wants to go there ?) The old lady with vegetables in her hand, on the wrong side of age is struggling to multi task. She's got to cross the road, hold those heavy bags and then try to climb the bus because the last 20 minutes have yielded no success in trying to get umpteen rickshaw drivers to do what they are supposed to do, ferry people, no matter where as long as it is in Mumbai city Muncipal limits. Oh and yes, the responses are very innovative too..They'd vary from a swift drive away, to a nay saying nodding head to maybe a fuckall reason. But this works for the rickshaw guys and taximen who face no opposition from the commuter, because maybe, they were not in the mood for an argument to screw their happiness early in the morning. But for the gritty customer who would not go without an argument, these fuckers employ a different strategy. You ask them if they are in the mood to do you a favour and they reply with " Nahi bahut traffic hain ". Or an even more innovative " Gas nahi hain ". Perhaps the most amazing presence of mind is demonstrated with the " Bahut thakk gaya hoon " alibi.
Let me see if I can think of something to help you lazy, manipulative bastards. You could try putting up a board with a standard chart of names of say roads, localities, complexes, areas, if you will. These will tell us , hopeful , poor, commuters of the possibility of a favour that you will do on to us. This will be a list of the areas that you would most willingly "agree" to ply to and drop us. So whenever we need a ride, we'll read up the board and then dare to ask you. Also , I'd request you to put up timings on the board of the times that you would want to rest, go to some specific places etc, information that would help us make sure that you serve us only when u feel like it so that we don't disturb your plans of sight seeing or any other wasteful activity you'd want to do . Sounds good ?
So it finally boils down to this - You know that if you incapacitate us , Mumbai's infrastructure is so horrid that there is no other alternative to you than to ride the train and bus. You stay off roads and get the city to a grinding halt because you dont give a fuck for what the commuter faces or where he wants to go . You charge us more, to earn more , saying it is your right to lead a life of dignity. But in the end we get a raw deal. Eventhough its our money that fuels your livelihood, we still have to beg to get around. We still have to put up with your lousy behaviour and ask for your willingness to do something. We gotta take your shit to get you to do something that you should do without moving so much so as an eyelid. But no more. Unless we give these buggers back in kind we wont get anywhere. So fuck you you freaks, I'm coming for you and I won't ask you for a favour. I'll ask you to do what you are supposed to do and you will take me where I want to .... Other wise , I ll make sure you go to the India's second best place - the police station.
